Have you ever wondered what Parents have in common?
I am more than positive that every single parent have used these words…”what did I do in my spare time”. Once that little sproglet enters the world, you don’t remember life without them. It’s the strangest feeling. They may have only been in your life for a number of days, weeks or months yet what was I doing last year when I had all that free time? Did I make use of those hours for myself or did I binge watch 5 episodes of game of thrones. Yes I did, I binged the whole bloody programme.
The truth is once you become a parent you have a whole lot of juggling to do. You’re trying to manage the children plus your home, your life, relationships etc. It can be exhausting. How can you fit everything in 24hrs? Realistically I would love to read my books, write my blogs, and take more time to pamper my skin, hair and nails. Reality is once I finished work, gone to the gym, cooked tea, tidied up, bathed and put Roman to bed I have about as much time or energy to have a 5 minute shower and pass out . It is so easy to fall in to that circle of neglecting the things around you and then you can find yourself resenting the change without even knowing it. I will be the first to hold my hands up and admit it. I love my son so damn much and I have dreamed of being a mother for so long and when you hold that baby in your arms for the very first time your whole life rotates in to a different dimension and life is never the same again. Your focus is on keeping your baby fed, warm and happy and everything else comes in second place. You read books and go to anti-natal classes on how to relax with delivery/how to keep your partner as comfortable while in labour. How to look after your new-born and anything after that, but how do you cope with looking after you?
You start thinking that when you get any alone time is considered ‘Me time’. Having a bath or using the restroom is considered ‘me time’. What bullshit is that, that’s not me time? That is just basic needs. It’s very easy to feel rewarded when you get an half an hour break, while they nap and you can finally sit down with that reheated brew and catch up on your favourite programme you’ve been dying to watch since last Tuesday. Do you really feel elevated? Refreshed? No. Why would you? Start making ‘me time’ worthwhile, take time out to do the things you loved and was passionate about before the primary focus was on your minions. Go out for a date, socialise with friends. Use the network of support around. Stop neglecting you. This is your life too even if you are second most of the time.
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