Life with a two year old

2 years old

Tick tock, tick tock. I can finally hear the blunt knocks of the hand hitting the next second as my grey rustic Roman numeral clock strikes. One forty five in the afternoon already! (It’s actually Quarter to three but I have neglected my shabby chic device until I have the enthusiasm to adjust its time or I might even wait for the clocks to go back until it corrects itself) Time will tell. {Pun intended.} Anyway before I drift off again, the reason why I can hear my wannabe vintage clock is because I have just got my boisterous play date off to sleep. *deep breath in* While he exhales Zzz into the afternoon I am once again faced with a mountain of toys, boxes, cushions, pieces of half chewed food all launched across my milky stained carpet. The best way to describe living with a toddler is, imagine someone breaking into your property, trashing the place and then leaving. Unfortunately the downside is, they don’t leave and this happens every day.

Once I poured myself a double gin and tonic (What!) and put all the toys and furniture back in their place, straightened up my boohoo wicker lantern. I started to collect the colourful birthday cards with the big metallic 2 plastered on each one. We recently celebrated Romans second birthday, because of the Covid-19 outbreak we could only have close family round. So we panic bought 17 pizzas, munched out to Goodfella’s cheese crust heavenly goodness and popped open a bottle of fizz. I was thankful that we were able to do this, as his birthday was just before the UK went into lockdown. We still have his deflated balloons from his birthday half hanging in the air looking very thin of helium, his space theme birthday banner propped up with thick sellotape and his cartoon cards perched on the window silll, his birthday feels like a distant memory now but I also don’t have the heart to take it all down. Plus are you meant to keep your children’s birthday cards or throw them out? I kept his first birthday cards but what do you about the next birthdays after that?  

I have a two year old. An energetic, funny, confident, selective hearing, bouncy 2 year old. I was sceptical about reaching this next chapter with the classic “terrible twos” lingering over my mind like a funky smell but so far THIS is my favourite age. Fuck the stereotypical saying. What’s not to love; your little offspring is now starting to find their voice and use words like “mummy” “daddy”. I feel completely privileged to be called mummy even if Roman’s bellowing it out 13 times just so I turn the TV over to the next channel. In fact he is now stringing 3 words together to make a sentence. He is able to tell me exactly what he wants or doesn’t want “NO WAY MUMMY”. He is a sponge absorbing new words every day and I can feel the butterflies summersaulting in my belly as the gibberish sounds form into a conversation. That in mind we haven’t got to stage where myself and Roman are gossiping in the corner, most of our conversation start off with me trying to crack The Da Vinci Code. 

2 years old-spring-dandelions

I took Roman and my Chihuahua Bailey for our one walk of the day, and as I was about to hurry my curious little slow coach, I stopped. I watched him infatuated by the yellow dandelions that are now starting to blossom as the elegant spring starts to poke its warm glow out from the wintery clouds. It made me realise the illusion has disappeared, the blinkers are up. I stopped appreciating. I didn’t care about the meddling weeds emerging together but to my son he didn’t see them as “just weeds” They were fluorescent. They decorated the boring green grass. He’s a 2 year old boy enchanted with the new world he’s now noticing for the first time properly. His head flung back and eyes widens to the sky as he heard a crow screech past singing to his fellow crows. He crunched his boots on the bark that had dropped off from the shredding tree. I listened with him. I picked off one of the dandelions and held it up to eye level, I felt my curiosity peer through and I took notice of the orange and yellow petals, the purple stalk holding them all together. I felt a sense of pleasure noticing the colours of spring and cool breeze brushing past me. It made me realise that while I want to teach Roman the wonders of the world, I also want to remember what it was like to be inspired and exhilarated by the magic. It’s about learning together. 

Roman will start to learn new words, shapes, colours, animals and coordinating. I have enjoyed working out new games and ideas to get his mind occupied. Every learning curve is a stepping stone, and right now we are taking baby steps into the world of potty training. I am as clueless to potty training, as Roman is to taking his big boy pants off and sitting on his make shift toilet. So far my leg, carpet and Roman’s socks have been urinated on more times than the eye sore that is sitting in my living room. Once I have mastered the toilet training and received my medal of long service and good conduct (medal meaning Tesco finest Sauvignon Blanc) I may humour myself on to the next step, teaching Roman to bake a cake, attempt to get Roman to pick up his own toys or even get him to sleep in his own god damn bed. 

I am studying Roman every day, and he is discovering how far to push. I am only a month in to a “life with a two year old” so we will see if I am still surviving in 6 months. I will keep you updated and will inform you of what I uncover, achieve and how many bottles of Parma violet gins I have consumed. (I might just have a drinking problem) To be continued…

Things Roman loves at the moment 


* Hitting me with the spoons.

*Toy Rhinos

*Hitting me with the toy Rhinos, or anything else he can hit me with.

Thank you for reading

Credit- I wanted to give credit to Andy Jones who encouraged me to continue writing my blogs up, so thank you

Published by Roman’s Mum

Hi, Roman’s mum here aka Courtney Anderson I’m 25 years old, and I’m a first time mum to my gorgeous son. I work part time and the other half i get to enjoy precious time with my boy. When I’m at work I like to be professional, I take pride in my appearance. I socialise with adults, but when I’m the stay at home mum I unfortunately look nothing like i did the day before. My hair’s scrapped back with snot and biscuit smudged into my day pyjamas barely keeping any sanity together. On the odd occasion I do find time to get my shit together, I will take photos as evidence. I want to share my experiences of motherhood, from going on holiday’s to milestones. You name it I want to share it.

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